We have been asked to report to the police any suspicious
behavior we might observe. Well, I observe suspicious behavior
all the time. Yesterday, there was a man in a dress picking up
chewing gum off the street. And later that same day, someone
fired out about a hundred rifle shots just down the street from
me. You can’t go calling the police every time something seems
out of kilter. For one thing, you’d be drawing too much attention
to yourself, and the next thing you know you’d be suspect. I try to keep
a low profile. The police are always a bit jumpy and hair-triggered.
Not that I blame them. I’m sure I would be the same if I was in
their shoes. I wait until there is a direct threat upon my life,
and then I call them. Oh, and then how I love to watch them fly
into action. Guns, billyclubs, handcuffs, all so swift and certain,
then the villain is whisked away never to be seen again. I am
definitely on the side of law and order. But I would prefer to
stay off their radar just to be on the safe side. I mean, I saw
two grown women playing with sticks in the elementary school play-
ground. Maybe I should have reported them, but I didn’t. I did
make a note of it, though. I saw an Arab prince in a Mercedes Benz
run a red light downtown. I wrote it down in my notebook, complete
with license plate number. I saw eight wolves in cages in back of
a house. I took a note. The police need their rest so they can be
fully alert when the real trouble arises. If you called them every
time you saw a man in a funny hat fire off a gun in public they’d