I don’t know what to say to you
and have called you names—mutilator of souls,
warden of dust, evocateur— that only placed me
at a disadvantage. I turn my sweet gaze
away and lose you, I fall in love with small
women selling curios, and come to in white rooms
high above the city to the sound of faint
music and a child crying. Why are the walls
rubbled and muddled like the walls of caves?

I forgot you at times, chased wounded birds
into the thickets, small, yellow-eyed hawks
and less important creatures, and it was
not only from despair that I stayed away
from your palaces: I came to love the woods
and the small declivities in which cool
water stood calmly as if sleeping.